Why John 3:30 Can Save Any Relationship

The world will fight against you every step of the way

It’s a weighty claim to hoist upon the shoulders of one verse, but the world’s determination against it provides ample evidence of its ability to ring true.

Let’s start with the sub-headline and recognize the difficult road ahead.

First, human nature is a curious thing. In every part of life are examples of how the world pushes us to focus on ourselves. Use “The world honors” in front of each example:

— those who get good grades in school

— successful businesses

— successful athletes

— famous actors/actresses

— men/women in government

— popular musicians

The list continues because people in every walk of life are admired if they do something, according to the world, better than others. With the advent of the Internet, this problem exponentially expanded. When something of note happens in the world, people know about it — often instantly.

From the first waking minutes of any day, a major challenge awaits Christians. Will they bend to the world that promotes individual increase?

How can John 3:30 provide a remedy for worldwide problems?

ONE POWERFUL VERSE

In the English Standard version, John 3:30 says, “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

The speaker is John the Baptist. Moments earlier he stated, “I am not the Christ, but I have been sent before him.”

John was pointing to the preeminence of Christ. Christians may follow John’s lead when they pray something like, “Dear Lord, please hide Pastor Jones behind the cross as he preaches.” In other words, bring Jesus to the forefront.

Unfortunately, this way of thinking and praying is often confined to church and worship settings.

What if we applied it to everyday life?

SUBMISSION

One of the first things Christians must do is admit a need for John 3:30. We have to understand the human-nature pull to increase. It is constant pressure.

Both “musts” in the verse are present tense and speak of continual necessity. It’s possible to successfully use John 3:30, grow in John 3:30, and falter badly with John 3:30 all in the same day — or perhaps even within an hour. We know the enemy prowls around like a lion, looking for someone to devour. The shield of faith must be raised at all times.

But how do we “use” John 3:30 to save a relationship?

JOHN’S USE

John used the words to provide a strong affirmation: He knew how to stay in his lane. He was a forerunner of the greater ministry of Jesus.

As Christians, we use the first part of the verse to exalt Jesus. He must increase.

But our world impact comes from how we use the second part. I must decrease.

Think of your total being as a whole. If Jesus is one percent, and you are 99 percent, there’s a lot of work to be done. Let’s say another person is 50-50. Pretty good, huh? Maybe, if you want to face every day knowing you will fall on your spiritual face half the time.

The goal is 100 percent Jesus and zero percent me. Yes, it’s impossible, but remember the verse speaks of continual necessity. And every time we decrease, we should let it create momentum and hope to decrease further.

TYING IT TOGETHER

You can approach this from either side because they work together for the same goal. You can either strive to increase Jesus or endeavor to decrease yourself.

The second one is tougher. We can strive to increase Jesus by reading more Scripture, praying more often, or attending church more frequently. But decreasing self goes against every grain of today’s world.

Here are a couple of examples:

— A married couple gets into an argument, which continues as each side digs in. A John 3:30 decrease by one person will end the stalemate. It’s a matter of resolve: I surrender my side of the argument to Christ.

— A mother fights with her teenage daughter about an important issue. The mother sees danger while the daughter refuses to acknowledge it. In this example, the mother is right. But her John 3:30 decrease ends the argument, prevents further relationship damage, and — importantly — puts the issue in the hands of the Lord, who is in control anyway.

Those examples can be big things, but what about little ones?

— Letting a person go in front of you at a crowded grocery store check-out lane.

— Holding your tongue when someone else takes credit for something you’ve done.

— Sharing your wealth without letting anyone know.

The goal is to reach for this verse whenever conflict or honor surrounds you — to become less while Christ shines brighter. It’s not about grudgingly conceding victory. Rather it’s the idea that submitting the details to Jesus is always the best path.

When our will decays, Christ’s will grows fertile in our hearts. And with the nourishment of this soul-sustaining daily bread, we find our ability to decrease continually — and Jesus increases to keep us whole.

And here’s a beautiful way the Scripture works together. When a person lets their light shine and follows the command of Matthew 5:l6, the increase of Jesus causes a natural decrease in the person whose light is shining!